A halcyon day before the storms gathered

Jan 15 1965. My 8th birthday. Saw Mary Poppins at the Leicester square Odeon followed by a birthday celebration at a
Lyons corner house.It was a halcyon day before the storms gathered. I may have been odd, but if so other children had not reacted as though I was. 5 days later I started boarding school.The place where sons of diplomats go at the age of 8 or less. I was totally unsuited for it. I was faced with something I struggled to cope with. Not overtly traumatic ,but traumatic nonetheless. It manifested in bed-wetting. The differences between the other boys and me became glaringly apparent on going to public school. Like a lot of my generation found decades later to be autistic I was subjected to severe bullying. In my case it was verbal. The result was increasingly poor mental health resulting in an overdose at the end of my penultimate term there.

I went back for what should have been my A level term so as not to disappointment my father. I lasted a week before saying I couldn't cope. After a few days in the school sanatorium I was admitted to Severalls psychiatric hospital.

Comments

  • Statest16Statest16 Citizen, Mentor
    Interesting,so your younger than my oldest sister and older than my second oldest sister.
    I'm the second youngest of seven,so  a lot of people older than me are younger than my siblings and my parents are older than there parents.
  • verityverity Administrator, Citizen
    edited April 5
    As you know share a common history both having diplomatic parents, both going to boarding school at 8 years. Both bullied. So I relate a lot also remember others with difficulties like bed wetting, substance abuse self harm, and the cruelty of others.

    I'm sorry you weren't able to get out of there faster. I managed to convince my parents that I had enough and went to school in Jamaica for 2 years. I did go back to another boarding school for A Levels, and I was very reclusive in it. I also became increasing withdrawn in university once I moved campus that tended to have more snooty individuals.

    Whilst my mental health issue never lead to being admitted, I still had a bit of a n uphill struggle.

    Now I try to put a lot of that behind me. I realise it is easier said than done, but I don't want it to define me.

    I think it does highlight the importance of the right envirment for people on the spectrum, in terms of living and

  • verityverity Administrator, Citizen
    Statest16 said:
    Interesting,so your younger than my oldest sister and older than my second oldest sister.
    I'm the second youngest of seven,so  a lot of people older than me are younger than my siblings and my parents are older than there parents.

    Not sure what that has to do with the opening post.
  • Statest16Statest16 Citizen, Mentor
    verity said:
    Statest16 said:
    Interesting,so your younger than my oldest sister and older than my second oldest sister.
    I'm the second youngest of seven,so  a lot of people older than me are younger than my siblings and my parents are older than there parents.

    Not sure what that has to do with the opening post.
    I'm not sure either
  • AmityAmity Administrator, Citizen
    Jan 15 1965. My 8th birthday. Saw Mary Poppins at the Leicester square Odeon followed by a birthday celebration at a
    Lyons corner house.It was a halcyon day before the storms gathered. I may have been odd, but if so other children had not reacted as though I was. 5 days later I started boarding school.The place where sons of diplomats go at the age of 8 or less. I was totally unsuited for it. I was faced with something I struggled to cope with. Not overtly traumatic ,but traumatic nonetheless. It manifested in bed-wetting. The differences between the other boys and me became glaringly apparent on going to public school. Like a lot of my generation found decades later to be autistic I was subjected to severe bullying. In my case it was verbal. The result was increasingly poor mental health resulting in an overdose at the end of my penultimate term there.

    I went back for what should have been my A level term so as not to disappointment my father. I lasted a week before saying I couldn't cope. After a few days in the school sanatorium I was admitted to Severalls psychiatric hospital.
    Your story Firemonkey leads me to think of the Autism in previous generations of my family. They are gone now and lived without a paradigm to frame their experience of the world, just thinking about the brutality they were subjected to and the trauma they surely lived with gives me shudders.

    School for me wasn't too different from home, if there was a silver lining to come out of it... By secondary school there was very little a bully could do that scared me, except for being really outnumbered.

    Its good to talk about these experiences, better than keeping them locked away.
  • I'm so sorry to hear you went through that, firemonkey. I can't imagine being sent off to boarding school. It must have been dreadful. And to any others of you who had to go to boarding school. 
  • HylianHylian Citizen, Mentor
    It's very weird how different interactions with other children could be outside of school VS in school.

    When I was in the nursery/daycare at church as a toddler while the rest of my family went to worship, most of the kids either ignored me or played with me occasionally. Most kids weren't rude to me.

    At playgrounds throughout my childhood I managed to play with other kids just fine, and made some "friends".

    During school though, other kids were mean to me and seemed to go out of their way to exclude and upset me, even in Kindergarten.

    I wonder what makes kids so inclusive outside of school VS in school.
  • At least you’re out of that crap now, Firemonkey.

    Just remember that you have at least 20 more years ahead of you.

    With your new knowledge of yourself, you can do a lot to make yourself happy.

    Try not to let the past interfere with your present and future.
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