The Value of Friendship And Its Impact On Our Well Being.
Teach51
Citizen
Having not been blessed with the benefits and support that a healthy, functional family provides, I have nevertheless been blessed throughout my life with unconditional and abundant support from friends. In my darkest moments they stood firmly on my side, and lifted me up from the depths of the most painful life experiences.
There was a time when my marriage ended, my assets were stolen, when my friends literally fed me and raised the money so I could get legal representation.(Payed back in full thankfully) By their merit I still have my own home today. They acted on my behalf when I was barely able to function myself.
Choosing positive, supportive, good hearted friends is so important especially when a nurturing, loving childhood was absent.
This is a thread to celebrate the blessings of friendship. Who has changed your life for the better? What acts of kindness and support have you experienced? How did you meet your good friends? What positive impact has friendship had on your life?
There was a time when my marriage ended, my assets were stolen, when my friends literally fed me and raised the money so I could get legal representation.(Payed back in full thankfully) By their merit I still have my own home today. They acted on my behalf when I was barely able to function myself.
Choosing positive, supportive, good hearted friends is so important especially when a nurturing, loving childhood was absent.
This is a thread to celebrate the blessings of friendship. Who has changed your life for the better? What acts of kindness and support have you experienced? How did you meet your good friends? What positive impact has friendship had on your life?
Comments
I can think of many friends who blessed my life along the way, although most of us have grown apart over time. I'll describe a couple of them.
I had a very close friend when I was 13-14, when I was starting to notice my inability to keep up with NT girls. We met at school and used to get into loads of mischief being "cool". I pulled away because I needed a lot of time alone, and I was anxious following the trends or understanding the nuance of teenaged girls. She understood me like no one ever had at that time. Few people have since. We didn't know the word Autism, but she recognised all of my unique personality traits and tried her best to encourage me socially, as well as with sensory function. She was such a wonderful friend. I still have the letters and notes we wrote back and forth, hundreds of pages worth, and those memories will last a lifetime.
At work I met my dear friend from Trinidad. Trini and I were especially close, and I'm actually the godmother of her grandson. She taught me about Hindu culture and we always had each other's back, through thick and thin. Her brother committed suicide and she was notified at work. I rocked her in my arms and let her cry as she was inconsolable. I slept a week at her house, cooking and taking care of her housework so she could rest and grieve. Years later when we were no longer working together I had my stroke, she frequently drove me to and from stroke rehab so I wouldn't have to take the wheelchair bus. We'd laugh and head out on adventures, with her pushing me in a wheelchair through shopping malls so I wouldn't need to use my walker. When I broke my foot at home, she came and drove me to hospital so I wouldn't need to hobble to an Uber with my walker, unassisted. We travelled to Cuba with our children, and spent hours walking the beach talking about Hinduism, reincarnation, and other spiritual topics. Her fiery personality brought me out of depression on several occasions, just as my quiet support gave her confidence. We were a great match.
My best friend is a gay man I used to date almost 25 years ago. We also met through work. He literally saved my life, rescuing me from my trauma situation and getting me immediate inpatient care for mental health and physical injuries. There's a lot of history for us as friends. We test the limits of each other's patience in some regards, because our personalities are quite different, but we're both oddballs and we make it work even when I shut down and don't talk for quite a while. I know we'd both do anything for the other. We own a lakeside property together (I've posted photos). He lives there and I visit when I can to fish and go boating. He helped to raise my kids, and still keeps in contact with them wherever they travel. I helped him to navigate the effects of childhood trauma, depression, and ADHD. He likes to crossdress and thinks he may be a transwoman. I've always supported him to be himself, even though the revelation ended our romantic relationship in 2002.
I have online friends as well. Those friendships run deep, and there is a reciprocity of care that seems mutally-supportive by fostering self-reflection, and everything from jokes to serious life issues.
Friends mean the world to me.
I think friendships are very important, even if you only have a few, a partner to fulfil this role or online friends.
I value my friendships very highly and take time to build them. A good friendship is like a relationship and it takes time and actions on both sides to develop real closeness and trust.