Home General ASD

Are you "noticeably autistic"?

HylianHylian Citizen, Mentor
Is it apparent to other people that you have autism, or less specifically something "wrong" with you?

I can tell that other people know something is "wrong" with me because they react to me like they think I'm odd, and sometimes people avoid interacting with me due to it. I also get stared at sometimes.

People have treated me like this my whole life and it can frustrate me. I usually don't know why people are reacting like that since I try to act "normal", so it makes me self conscious and want to avoid interacting with others.
«1

Comments

  • Statest16Statest16 Citizen, Mentor
    edited August 2022
    I'm not noticeably autistic in the sense that people know I'm autistic.At age 47 I have learned to blend in.I am noticeable in the sense that I am to different to be taken seriously or viewed as being part of other people's groups,in other words I'm seen as an outsider.
  • verityverity Administrator, Citizen
    Not in passing. If people get to knwo me well (if I let them), then it is hard to hide.
  • HylianHylian Citizen, Mentor
    Most people don't pinpoint that I'm specifically autistic, though I think they can tell I'm developmentally delayed in some way. I get treated like a kid by others, if they don't treat me like I'm odd.
  • At prep school they said I was the 'missing link'. At public school a classroom of boys directed monkey chans at me.I've had people laugh at me when I'm walking outside. Due no doubt to my odd gait.
  • HylianHylian Citizen, Mentor
    In elementary school I was bullied a lot because I was obviously "different" from other kids. People also sometimes stare at me when I walk or do other activities involving motor skills, because I'm very uncoordinated and have a really bad sense of balance.
  • WizardryWizardry Citizen, Mentor
    I know it's been apparent enough to some people based on how I've been treated in the past. I think sometimes I can blend in, but in certain situations, my autism shows.
  • AmityAmity Administrator, Citizen
    The older I get, the more aware I'm becoming of how I didn't blend in, even though I felt at the time that I had successfully masked my differences. In that sense yes I feel noticably Autistic.

    Noticeably Autistic to others though... I dont think there is enough awareness of what Autism is for people to really pinpoint how I appear differently to a person without Autism.
    I'm likely being very literal here though.

    No one who knew me as a child could believe I was Autistic when I told them, but after explaining how I was typical for an Autistic girl, they could sort of understand, but still felt that I was just sensitive or quiet etc in a typical way.
  • SlyFoxSlyFox Citizen, Member
    edited September 2022
    no and its bad and good.
  • AmityAmity Administrator, Citizen
    I can relate to that feeling Slyfox
  • Yes, I absolutely am.  I flap my hands, make noises, have awkward body language, and people tell me I often have odd facial expressions.  If I'm alone in public sometimes people walk up to me and ask me if I'm okay or if I need help.  Sometimes I will say no thank you I don't need help but sometimes they insist that I do and won't leave me alone and it's really annoying.  Nowadays when I go out I bring my aide with me, it's just too much otherwise. 
  • darkcloak_dragondarkcloak_dragon New Member, Member
    Noticeably "off," especially now that I'm too tired/disinclined to act normal, but I doubt many would guess autism. I'm typically seen as much younger than I am; who knows what people see besides that.
  • HylianHylian Citizen, Mentor
    I get asked if I'm okay a lot, too. I also get seen and treated as if I'm a lot younger than I am.
  • MoonikaMoonika New Member, Member
    edited November 2022
    Yes, every day of my life, throughout the day I get looks, giggles, mean people teasing me. Definitely know what's 'wrong' with myself now. Because I don't mask and care as much as I used to, it became way more severe.
  • Moonika said:
    Yes, every day of my life, throughout the day I get looks, giggles, mean people teasing me. Definitely know what's 'wrong' with myself now. Because I don't mask and care as much as I used to, it became way more severe.
    There are a lot of unpleasant non-thinkers who are governed by their base emotional needs rather than their intellect.
    Where I come from, they are called "troglodytes". 🤓

  • MoonikaMoonika New Member, Member
    edited November 2022
    Sheldon said:
    Moonika said:
    Yes, every day of my life, throughout the day I get looks, giggles, mean people teasing me. Definitely know what's 'wrong' with myself now. Because I don't mask and care as much as I used to, it became way more severe.
    There are a lot of unpleasant non-thinkers who are governed by their base emotional needs rather than their intellect.
    Where I come from, they are called "troglodytes". 🤓

    Yes, and their whole science is skewed, times and times again they confuse eccentricism with insanity and stupidity or lack of ability and talent, and disregard the obvious, the label is everything to them. 

    Times and times they mistake big brands and all black for good fashion. 

    Times and times they show lack of knowledge about international styles. 

    Times and times again they confuse freedom for manipulation and vice-versa, and have no idea about the differences between wearing something and what one believes and how one feels. 

    Needing to know a person is what makes people become far away from knowing. The more they seek it and need it, the bigger the failure, also because of the problem with the lack of knowledge and education. Like my friend would say, 'overpopulation, undereducation.' Quality is superior, we end up teaching these people's kids when they get online and suicidal. 
  • I have an odd gait and rather poor coordination. That makes me stand out even if I say nothing. I can be spoken to as if I'm a bit simple minded, even though  only 1 in >1000  of  such people is actually more intelligent than me.
  • Statest16Statest16 Citizen, Mentor
    I got a haircut yesterday and the woman who cut my hair reffered to me in the third person.Made me wonder why?
  • verityverity Administrator, Citizen
    Statest16 said:
    I got a haircut yesterday and the woman who cut my hair reffered to me in the third person.Made me wonder why?

    Maybe she thought you were aristocratic?

    "Does one require a haircut?" 😉
  • Moonika said:
    Yes, and their whole science is skewed, times and times again they confuse eccentricism with insanity and stupidity or lack of ability and talent, and disregard the obvious, the label is everything to them. 

    Times and times they mistake big brands and all black for good fashion. 

    Times and times they show lack of knowledge about international styles. 

    Times and times again they confuse freedom for manipulation and vice-versa, and have no idea about the differences between wearing something and what one believes and how one feels.
    Most ppl are NT, and the majority usually determines social norms.
    While we do have social disabilities, we are encumbered with social rules that are sometimes against our natural inclinations.

    "Honesty" Vs "Diplomacy" is one of the challenges many on the spectrum have to contend with, as an example.

    I find it absurd that some NTs consider us foolish simply because we tend to have a natural inclination towards respecting the Truth.
    "You" don't have to lie to support friends, but tell that to most young NTs. 🙃

    Admittedly, at times it seems to be an unavoidable necessity in rare situations.
    I simply suggest ppl don't make a habit of it. ;)

  • Statest16Statest16 Citizen, Mentor
    verity said:
    Statest16 said:
    I got a haircut yesterday and the woman who cut my hair reffered to me in the third person.Made me wonder why?

    Maybe she thought you were aristocratic?

    "Does one require a haircut?" 😉
    Confused ,not sure if your joking or serious?
    Even if so,would a wealthy man be reffered in the third person?
  • Statest16 said:
    I got a haircut yesterday and the woman who cut my hair reffered to me in the third person.Made me wonder why?
    Do you like the haircut? :-)
  • Statest16Statest16 Citizen, Mentor
    Teach51 said:
    Statest16 said:
    I got a haircut yesterday and the woman who cut my hair reffered to me in the third person.Made me wonder why?
    Do you like the haircut? :-)
    I detect more sarcasm,yes I like the haircut ,a basic crew cut with the razor really but I prefer short.

  • verityverity Administrator, Citizen
    Statest16 said:
    Maybe she thought you were aristocratic?

    "Does one require a haircut?" 😉
    Confused ,not sure if your joking or serious?
    Even if so,would a wealthy man be reffered in the third person?

    The older Royals and the upper class in UK often refer to themselves or others as 'one'

    Also they might not say "Do you...?" they would say "Does one...?"

    It is an formal but deliberately impersonal way of talking.

  • verityverity Administrator, Citizen
    There are bunch or reasons why third person is used.

    One reason is is someone is curious about something but doesn't want to come across as as too direct or nosy they might ask "So what is Statest up to these days?" rather then 'you'.

    If they don't want to be accusatory or implicate "How would someone get some loot?"

    Also sometime they are attempting to elevate the person, it is almost like saying you are more important so it would be rude to not address you without using your name. This is semi serious like a complement.

    It might also be due to pronoun politics but probably not.

    Other languages might have different conventions.

    I try to keep conversations short at the barber usually, as often they feel obligated to talk to customers, when actually they just want to get on with it. Obviously some enjoy them banter.




  • Statest16Statest16 Citizen, Mentor
    verity said:
    Statest16 said:
    Maybe she thought you were aristocratic?

    "Does one require a haircut?" 😉
    Confused ,not sure if your joking or serious?
    Even if so,would a wealthy man be reffered in the third person?

    The older Royals and the upper class in UK often refer to themselves or others as 'one'

    Also they might not say "Do you...?" they would say "Does one...?"

    It is an formal but deliberately impersonal way of talking.

    I was not aware of that ,for English is so different there and one thing most don't realize as well is that aristocratic British English is not the same as RP either.
    English is fragmenting ,there already using Boston slang on are street signs.

    As a whole in the US ,reffering to someone in the third person means you view them as cute or adorable.As to whether that is insulting,is complex and a new can of worms.It surely has the potential to make one feel infantilized.
  • Statest16Statest16 Citizen, Mentor
    verity said:
    There are bunch or reasons why third person is used.

    One reason is is someone is curious about something but doesn't want to come across as as too direct or nosy they might ask "So what is Statest up to these days?" rather then 'you'.

    If they don't want to be accusatory or implicate "How would someone get some loot?"

    Also sometime they are attempting to elevate the person, it is almost like saying you are more important so it would be rude to not address you without using your name. This is semi serious like a complement.

    It might also be due to pronoun politics but probably not.

    Other languages might have different conventions.

    I try to keep conversations short at the barber usually, as often they feel obligated to talk to customers, when actually they just want to get on with it. Obviously some enjoy them banter.




    I sort of get what your saying although these things get very touchy in America because Americans are all (women included)so macho.

    Europeans refer to you a "dear" and it's all good and even talking with Teach who is Israeli we use the term yakarah (dear) and it's all fine.

    In America ,you call a man dear and you'll get the shit beaten out of you for emasculating him.And a woman would call you a chauvinist masogynist sexist pig for calling her dear.

    It's almost ironic that in super macho America people are sensitive to a few words,goes to show how crazy people are.
  • verityverity Administrator, Citizen
    It is usually older women who call younger men or women dear. When it is platonic. An older man could get away with it with a younger woman. They would likely be a grandfather, where it is obviously platonic an not done in a creepy way.

    Also 'love' is used in the same context, and american find this very odd when they visit to be called love at the checkout, but it is just a term of enderament.  Love would be more working class version of dear.

    In South Yorkshire / North Midlands the term 'duck' is used in place of love/dear.
  • verityverity Administrator, Citizen
    Ey up mi duck
  • verityverity Administrator, Citizen
    It is as old as shakespeare probably medieval.
  • verityverity Administrator, Citizen
    In scoland hen is used for females. Again women have more licence to use it.
Sign In or Register to comment.