My ASD Friend In Crisis.
Teach51
Citizen
in General ASD
I began my interaction on ASD Forums initially seeking info to help my dear friend who was suffering severe "burnout" at the time, and I was desperate to find her some relief.
I subsequently shared that she recovered, passed her Bar exam and became a qualified lawyer, landed a dream job with fantastic benefits and then, everything went belly up. My friend experiences things "differently." Meditation makes her nervous, she sleeps only 3 hours a night, often when she is sick the symptoms manifest completely differently to most people.18 months ago she had a severe abscess on her lady parts which refused to heal, in addition she got a Staphylococcus infection that is resistant to antibiotics and it began eating her flesh. A few months following that she began having pains in her foot, accompanied by a rotten stench and wound that eventually led to an additional hospitalization. Her glucose was in the 700's range, her foot was necrotic and was almost amputated. My friend had apparently suffered from Diabetes type 2 for many years with no symptoms at all, no thirst, weight loss, dizziness, weakness, thrush infections, nothing at all. By the time she was diagnosed she had severe neuropathy in her eyes, both legs, heart and is now in the space of a year unable to walk, is at risk of double amputation of her feet and suffered a heart attack 3 weeks ago and 3 stents were put in her heart. Needless to say she had not been having routine blood tests because she felt fine though her executive functioning and lack of sleep seem to impair her judgement of self-care and cause and effect. I actually was the first to think of a condition known as Charcot's Foot, which takes years of rampant Diabetes to develop and yes, unfortunately this was the correct diagnosis, suddenly my dear friend is struggling to survive and manage on a daily basis. Two weeks into her fantastic new job she was hospitalized operated on and then rehab.
finally she went back to work and 2 weeks later she had a heart attack. She is 55.
At work they think she duped them and knew she was sick prior to employment. Her disability presents them with legal implications regarding employment termination and everyone is now ignoring her. According to her she is abysmally bad at her job anyway, we had been colleagues at a language school which did not involve too much interaction with superiors and co- workers so she did ok though occasionally fell asleep while teaching. My friend has been denied any financial help or home help by the government though she lives alone and has no support.
My question is, is it common for people on the spectrum to not experience disease/malaise in the same way as neurotypicals? Is there an explanation as to why my friend is seriously and irreversibly physically impaired without feeling any usual early warning symptoms?
I subsequently shared that she recovered, passed her Bar exam and became a qualified lawyer, landed a dream job with fantastic benefits and then, everything went belly up. My friend experiences things "differently." Meditation makes her nervous, she sleeps only 3 hours a night, often when she is sick the symptoms manifest completely differently to most people.18 months ago she had a severe abscess on her lady parts which refused to heal, in addition she got a Staphylococcus infection that is resistant to antibiotics and it began eating her flesh. A few months following that she began having pains in her foot, accompanied by a rotten stench and wound that eventually led to an additional hospitalization. Her glucose was in the 700's range, her foot was necrotic and was almost amputated. My friend had apparently suffered from Diabetes type 2 for many years with no symptoms at all, no thirst, weight loss, dizziness, weakness, thrush infections, nothing at all. By the time she was diagnosed she had severe neuropathy in her eyes, both legs, heart and is now in the space of a year unable to walk, is at risk of double amputation of her feet and suffered a heart attack 3 weeks ago and 3 stents were put in her heart. Needless to say she had not been having routine blood tests because she felt fine though her executive functioning and lack of sleep seem to impair her judgement of self-care and cause and effect. I actually was the first to think of a condition known as Charcot's Foot, which takes years of rampant Diabetes to develop and yes, unfortunately this was the correct diagnosis, suddenly my dear friend is struggling to survive and manage on a daily basis. Two weeks into her fantastic new job she was hospitalized operated on and then rehab.
finally she went back to work and 2 weeks later she had a heart attack. She is 55.
At work they think she duped them and knew she was sick prior to employment. Her disability presents them with legal implications regarding employment termination and everyone is now ignoring her. According to her she is abysmally bad at her job anyway, we had been colleagues at a language school which did not involve too much interaction with superiors and co- workers so she did ok though occasionally fell asleep while teaching. My friend has been denied any financial help or home help by the government though she lives alone and has no support.
My question is, is it common for people on the spectrum to not experience disease/malaise in the same way as neurotypicals? Is there an explanation as to why my friend is seriously and irreversibly physically impaired without feeling any usual early warning symptoms?
Comments
I would say she must be seem immediately at the best possible hospital,I'm not anywhere near in medical understanding to say what's wrong.
Where is your friend,in Israel or elsewhere?
One suggestion could be Brigham & womens Hospital in Boston 617-732-5500
I discovered 5 years ago that I have had hay fever every summer for as long as I can remember. How could I not know that my sneezing streaming eyes and sniffles were hay fever? Today with some perspective looking back it was obvious, in the moment though it was just one of the many areas that I learned to ignore and distance myself from.
As an undiagnosed Autie, I learned not to trust my perception, eg I was exhausted after socialising, that simply meant that I need to do it more often and for longer to build up my tolerance, my body and mind needed to persevere and try harder as that was what everyone else was doing.
I didn’t listen to what my mind-body needed.
I’m largely hypersensitive, when it comes to touch based pain I am hyposensitive, I don’t feel it in the same way as a typical person would.
The explanation I have for this (based on my layman understanding) is the cingulate gyrus in the brain, linked to the limbic system, functions differently in how I perceive pain.
As I understand it, the cingulate gyrus can be significantly affected by diabetes also.
Amity said:The explanation I have for this (based on my layman understanding) is the cingulate gyrus in the brain, linked to the limbic system, functions differently in how I perceive pain.
Then you must please be consistent with your tests and check ups Amity. I wish I had been more vigilant in my care of my friend.
I had to laugh because one of the guys who collaborated on this article is called Frankenstein
I'm not sure whether or not she was terminated after the heart attack.
There are things I don't feel that others believe do hurt. There are things that are very painful to me and not to other people. I have no proof, of course, but my opinion now is that the different wiring in my brain screws up more than just executive functioning. It messes with all the senses and interpretation thereof.
If you want to send me a name in a PM, I will ask my Quaker meeting to hold her in the Light.
Hugs.
I kept thinking about this, as I had rather conflicting thoughts. On one hand, allistic people can also have a different perception of pain (even other sensations, I've met a surprising amount of people who can't tell the difference between being hungry and thirsty) and poor self-awareness.
I ended up going on the same path as Amity with this and suspect a mix of nature and nurture. Having some sensorial issues, and especially having issues processing sensations might definitely play a part if your friend struggles with this.
On the other, the way I grew up, pain was just a given that you had to push through, so aside from not always feeling it the same way as others, I wasn't really considering it a red flag or a sign that something is wrong: I just used to ignore it and brush it off for the most part, thinking "it will pass, it's not a big deal".
It's very possible that your friend lacks the ability to process some of these sensations in a way that makes sense and sends her an alert signal, and she might also not be that well attuned to her body and lack the needed awareness to pay attention and interpret the signals, especially if she wasn't taught to do this when young.
I started listening to and understanding my body and its signals later in life, mainly through practising sports and dancing, because that forced me to become aware and pay attention to individual parts and how they all work together, something I was completely oblivious of. And I needed to be taught that my physical sensations are important and telling me something.
This is just speculation, of course, as I don't know her. But I can see how it could happen and heard other people on the spectrum mentioning both these things.
I particularly resonate with what Amity said about not trusting my own perceptions, I think a lot of auties learn this. In childhood, any unpleasant or painful sensations were brushed off as nothing, and later some of these things were reinforced by (some) members of the medical profession who got either suspicious or confused by the way my test results and symptoms didn't seem to align well with each other.
And women, in general, are still taken a lot less seriously by doctors, especially when it comes to pain.
Thank you everyone for your input, it has been helpful.
Most people cannot make drastic changes all at once.
My thinking, not knowing anything more than what you have told us, is that concentrating on getting her blood sugar under control should be top priority and that may be all she can do at this time.
Once her blood sugar is stabilized, then she can work on the less pressing health issues.