Struggles with routine changes
I struggle with changing my routines. My mind usually wants to follow a predictable pattern even if it keeps me stagnant and unhappy. Such is the case with my dead end job. I hate it but I’ve been going to it for so long that whenever I try to look into things that could change my life, I remember that I have a work schedule and I worry whether or not trying something new will interfere with it. It will make me feel discouraged to the point I lose enthusiasm.
Even if I have time to do things before and after work, I still have difficulties doing different things than I normally do though lately I’ve just been resting in my bed or the couch because anhedonia has robbed me of all my passions.
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I have an opposite struggle, my mind has to constantly adjust to routine changes, I have been in a constant state of temporary employment and unemployment for too many years, with no end in sight.
I take time to adjust to the change in employment/unemployment, take weeks to settle into a new routine, reach a point where I have adjusted and figured out a way forward that has a balance in my life and for perhaps a month or two, I have the routine that I need.
Then I’m back anticipating the change in employment and searching for a new job and perhaps facing moving to a new house again so that I can have some work life balance instead of commuting.
Based on historical posts and a bigger context than this thread... I suggest that depression is in charge of your thoughts and not the real you, with that context in mind if you wish to speak about depression this thread can be moved to other conditions, if you wish to discuss a reciprocal Autism topic it can remain here.
My issue is kind of both autism and depression related at this point. Autism gives me the intense anxiety and reluctance, and depression takes away a lot of the energy that I normally have to deal with it. It's become very hard to force myself to do things and face changes to my life now due to it.