I still feel like I am in high school
No, I don’t ride the bus anymore nor do I have to eat cafeteria food and take mandatory classes anymore but on other levels, I still feel like I am in high school.
I am still surrounded by guys who obsess about football, cars as well as trucks, smoking, drinking, getting in fights, and blasting pop country or rap music depending on the demographic. I feel alone because no one is interested in history, dinosaurs, science fiction, and rock music the way I am and I feel sick due to suffering from sleep apnea, underdeveloped muscles, fat hanging off the worst areas of my body, and the heat is making it worse. I am made fun of for my physical attributes and even assumed to be gay. I try to work out in PE but my body doesn’t respond to my efforts. My body odor is also strong because I am allergic to antiperspirants and can’t wear sports deodorant. I am also “nose blind” so I can’t smell my stink but others can.
The girls love the bad boys who yell at them and physically harass them in various ways while they snarl me off when I try to approach them. Most of them call the music I like “Satanic” or “noise”, even if it’s something like the Red Hot Chili Peppers. I hope being nice and a “gentleman” as I was told to be will get me a girlfriend but it doesn’t work out. One girl even tells me to close my arm because my pit stinks. I see the girls also caressing and cuddling with other guys but I am left out.
I have a guitar because I want to play in a band for a living but few share my passion for rock music and even though I am taking lessons, I can’t play a single song. There are some guys who are getting a band going and I talk to them about joining but they essentially make me an understudy except I never get to actually cover for anyone.
My older brother gets more attention than I do and the girls are telling me things like “Your brother is so hot!”. Others sometimes confuse me for him and it frustrates me. He always has a girlfriend while I don’t. My mother is doing everything for him such as giving him a personal phone, vehicles he wants, and planning for him to go to A&M.
I go home alone while everyone else goes to a party. My older brother will throw some but I can’t join in since I am shy, don’t drink, don’t smoke, suck at the guitar, and I am ignored for the most part. I have online friends but they are doing more than I am and some are moving on from me. I have an unrequited love spell with one who always has a new boyfriend every few months and she cuts contact with me.
Comments
hmmm... have you experimented with brands designed for sensitive skin (dove for instance)?
seem to remember folks used to use talcum powder back before modern deodorants were invented... might be worth a try if you haven’t already
Talk to your doctor, you might have a fungal infection that can be fixed. Smelly fresh sweat is usually indicative of a health issue.
If you wash your feet, dry them well, and wear cotton or bamboo socks and reasonably good shoes, this shouldn't be a problem.
If it's due to excessive sweating, you could try some of those absorbent sports socks. Foot baths with Epsom salts or tea tree oil are pleasant and relaxing and you can do that while on your computer. Unless it's very cold, walk barefooted around the house.