Coping with Alexithymia

Teach51Teach51 Citizen
edited June 2022 in General ASD
I am in a relationship of 6 years with a man who has ASD with many comorbidities including alexithymia. I have shared often about communication challenges and difficulties though at the moment we seem to have reached our own special brand of intimacy, which really is the result of years of trial and error. Needless to say there is a very strong bond between us which seems to transcend all the challenges we both have faced. Any knowledge, personal experience, beyond the text book information that is available would be greatly appreciated. I imagine that this is also a spectrum and has various degrees of severity. Anything that is related to living with Alexithymia would be most welcome.

*edited for the sake of my partner's privacy


  • Are you familiar with the communication methodology known as "Non-Violent Communication" (NVC)?

    Depending on the specific nature and causes of his alexithymia, communicating with your partner about your own feelings in the NVC style MIGHT perhaps be a good way to help him acquire more of an emotional vocabulary.

  • Teach51Teach51 Citizen
    Yes, I have been doing that with very successful results.  I am not familiar with the NVC style it was just instinct. Saying what I need and feel without criticizing him.(Well to be honest after the criticism and blame proved to be totally counter-productive) I am looking up NVC. You know it made him so happy that he made me feel good. He was amazing. I knew I was on the right track but I didn't really know how I had got there. Thank you so much Mona, you have been very helpful, I  hope you are well, good to see you here.
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