Hello but unsure of staying

Some of you here might know me from Wrong Planet but I no longer post on there. I was recommended this place but I am unsure about staying full time here.

The beginning of the year was rough for me. I got extorted online by someone malicious and I didn’t get an interview for a job I applied to. I also still don’t have a girlfriend, a college degree, my own place to live, and not having those goals met still makes me depressed.

I did attend a book club event and the people were friendly. A woman even gave me a hug but I fear that the group will go the way of the previous Meet Up group I tried were I was treated poorly by others so I had to stop going.

I suppose I want others that know me to know I am still alive but still struggling and I wish my life was better.

Comments

  • Welcome.

    People here are much less apt to be "Internet warriors," and to have to have the "last word."

    All they want to do is hang out and have nice conversations.

  • Statest16Statest16 Citizen, Mentor

    Hi welcome,remember you from the bad place,I think you'll like here much better🙂

  • HylianHylian Citizen, Mentor

    Hello, Markness! It's really nice to see you here. 😊

    We aren't the most active forum yet, but the people here are very supportive and are here for you if you need to vent or need advice.

    Also, feel free to start threads about anything you want! While this is an autism forum, you are encouraged to make threads about any topic that interests you.

    I hope you get something out of this forum, even if you end up not using it for long.

  • @kraftiekortie said:
    Welcome.

    People here are much less apt to be "Internet warriors," and to have to have the "last word."

    All they want to do is hang out and have nice conversations.

    That’s partly why I left that cesspit. I hope it will fade into obscurity.

    @Statest16 said:
    Hi welcome,remember you from the bad place,I think you'll like here much better🙂

    Thank you. I also post on Autism Forums and it’s much better than Whacky Podunk.

    @Hylian said:
    Hello, Markness! It's really nice to see you here. 😊

    We aren't the most active forum yet, but the people here are very supportive and are here for you if you need to vent or need advice.

    Also, feel free to start threads about anything you want! While this is an autism forum, you are encouraged to make threads about any topic that interests you.

    I hope you get something out of this forum, even if you end up not using it for long.

    Are you Hero of Hyrule?

    I used to hope I could post a celebratory topic about finally finding a girlfriend or that Alliekit would post it since she said it would if it happened but she’s disappeared without a trace. I want it to happen before I turn 40.

  • BenderBender Citizen

    Nice to see you here and welcome 🙂

    You can participate as you're comfortable, there's no pressure here.

  • IsabellaIsabella Citizen
    edited February 5

    Hello, welcome, and hugs to you Markness. ❤

  • HylianHylian Citizen, Mentor

    @Markness said:

    @Hylian said:
    Hello, Markness! It's really nice to see you here. 😊

    We aren't the most active forum yet, but the people here are very supportive and are here for you if you need to vent or need advice.

    Also, feel free to start threads about anything you want! While this is an autism forum, you are encouraged to make threads about any topic that interests you.

    I hope you get something out of this forum, even if you end up not using it for long.

    Are you Hero of Hyrule?

    I used to hope I could post a celebratory topic about finally finding a girlfriend or that Alliekit would post it since she said it would if it happened but she’s disappeared without a trace. I want it to happen before I turn 40.

    Yup, I'm HeroOfHyrule.

    I really hope that you are able to find a girlfriend and can post that celebratory topic about it. Have you met any women lately that seem like they may end up interested in dating you?

  • AmityAmity Administrator, Citizen

    Hi there Markness and welcome, Im glad you decided to join and post!

    We are new, it is quieter here and the aim is to make it a civil experience for everyone.
    Verity and I mostly take care of the admin/moderation and if you are unsure about anything just ask... One of us are usually around and if not our lovely mentors Hylian, Statest and Wizardry or Council members Teach51, Blazingstar and Bender know the site quite well at this stage.
    There is a section for almost any topic and as the days pass and your post count increases, more features and sections will become available to you.

    This stepped approach to membership isnt attractive to everyone, but that includes people who join forums just to troll, they dont get access to everything immediately so instant gratification isnt available. Its leading to some very comfortable conversations on a broad range of topics.

    Also your voice counts here, if you have a suggestion or recommendation for the site, post it in site discussion section and if its possible or feasible Verity and I will do our best to make it happen within our limits of ability!

    Any hassles... let me know and I will be on it, though tbh it is quite unlikely 😉

  • @Bender said:
    Nice to see you here and welcome 🙂

    You can participate as you're comfortable, there's no pressure here.

    Thank you, Bender. No bed wetters here, huh? ;)

    @Isabella said:
    Hello, welcome, and hugs to you Marknis. ❤

    Thank you, Isabella. This world needs more people like you. hugs

    @Hylian said:

    @Markness said:

    @Hylian said:
    Hello, Markness! It's really nice to see you here. 😊

    We aren't the most active forum yet, but the people here are very supportive and are here for you if you need to vent or need advice.

    Also, feel free to start threads about anything you want! While this is an autism forum, you are encouraged to make threads about any topic that interests you.

    I hope you get something out of this forum, even if you end up not using it for long.

    Are you Hero of Hyrule?

    I used to hope I could post a celebratory topic about finally finding a girlfriend or that Alliekit would post it since she said it would if it happened but she’s disappeared without a trace. I want it to happen before I turn 40.

    Yup, I'm HeroOfHyrule.

    I really hope that you are able to find a girlfriend and can post that celebratory topic about it. Have you met any women lately that seem like they may end up interested in dating you?

    Well, there was a lady who hugged me at the book club event. That at least tells me I am not a “creep” like my detractors have taunted me as. I don’t know if she’s looking to date or not but it was nice to receive a hug from a woman who isn’t family for a change.

    By the way, I finally played BoTW and rented the Twilight Princess manga from a library (Not the one I work at. Yuck!) because I want to get more into Zelda but I am close to being broke as a joke currently.

  • @Markness said:
    Some of you here might know me from Wrong Planet but I no longer post on there. I was recommended this place but I am unsure about staying full time here.

    The beginning of the year was rough for me. I got extorted online by someone malicious and I didn’t get an interview for a job I applied to. I also still don’t have a girlfriend, a college degree, my own place to live, and not having those goals met still makes me depressed.

    I did attend a book club event and the people were friendly. A woman even gave me a hug but I fear that the group will go the way of the previous Meet Up group I tried were I was treated poorly by others so I had to stop going.

    I suppose I want others that know me to know I am still alive but still struggling and I wish my life was better.

    Hi Markness sweety, so glad to see you here, I hope you will settle in and enjoy our company. Maybe you would like to start a music thread, I remember discussing music with you and you sharing some videos, if you have any questions regarding navigating the site just ask (not me I am hopeless with such things☺ someone technically competent would be better.) You will find we are a pretty positive bunch who treat each other respectfully and we have a lot of fun. Welcome once again!

  • @Amity said:
    Hi there Markness and welcome, Im glad you decided to join and post!

    We are new, it is quieter here and the aim is to make it a civil experience for everyone.
    Verity and I mostly take care of the admin/moderation and if you are unsure about anything just ask... One of us are usually around and if not our lovely mentors Hylian, Statest and Wizardry or Council members Teach51, Blazingstar and Bender know the site quite well at this stage.
    There is a section for almost any topic and as the days pass and your post count increases, more features and sections will become available to you.

    This stepped approach to membership isnt attractive to everyone, but that includes people who join forums just to troll, they dont get access to everything immediately so instant gratification isnt available. Its leading to some very comfortable conversations on a broad range of topics.

    Also your voice counts here, if you have a suggestion or recommendation for the site, post it in site discussion section and if its possible or feasible Verity and I will do our best to make it happen within our limits of ability!

    Any hassles... let me know and I will be on it, though tbh it is quite unlikely 😉

    Thank you, Amity.

    I can’t really think of suggestions right now but maybe they’ll come later.

    Unlike how things went on Whacky Podunk, I want to be able to post that I found a girlfriend.

  • HylianHylian Citizen, Mentor

    @Markness said:

    @Hylian said:
    Yup, I'm HeroOfHyrule.

    I really hope that you are able to find a girlfriend and can post that celebratory topic about it. Have you met any women lately that seem like they may end up interested in dating you?

    Well, there was a lady who hugged me at the book club event. That at least tells me I am not a “creep” like my detractors have taunted me as. I don’t know if she’s looking to date or not but it was nice to receive a hug from a woman who isn’t family for a change.

    By the way, I finally played BoTW and rented the Twilight Princess manga from a library (Not the one I work at. Yuck!) because I want to get more into Zelda but I am close to being broke as a joke currently.

    I definitely don't think that you're a creep, and you must be approachable if that woman felt comfortable hugging you. I think that's a promising sign for you, even if that particular girl wasn't looking for a boyfriend.

    Also, that's really cool! I have never read the manga for Twilight Princess, but I've heard a lot of good things about it.

  • verityverity Administrator, Citizen

    Welcome Markness🙂

    Sorry you had a bad year, there have been other than had similar experience, and and hope you feel comfortable here.

    Try it out see how it goes. There is the New Member Support category if you are struggling or just hang out.

  • edited February 4

    @Hylian said:

    @Markness said:

    @Hylian said:
    Yup, I'm HeroOfHyrule.

    I really hope that you are able to find a girlfriend and can post that celebratory topic about it. Have you met any women lately that seem like they may end up interested in dating you?

    Well, there was a lady who hugged me at the book club event. That at least tells me I am not a “creep” like my detractors have taunted me as. I don’t know if she’s looking to date or not but it was nice to receive a hug from a woman who isn’t family for a change.

    By the way, I finally played BoTW and rented the Twilight Princess manga from a library (Not the one I work at. Yuck!) because I want to get more into Zelda but I am close to being broke as a joke currently.

    I definitely don't think that you're a creep, and you must be approachable if that woman felt comfortable hugging you. I think that's a promising sign for you, even if that particular girl wasn't looking for a boyfriend.

    Also, that's really cool! I have never read the manga for Twilight Princess, but I've heard a lot of good things about it.

    I also didn’t know whether to ask her out right off the bat or talk to her more. I’ve gotten conflicting advice on this front.

    The art looks great and will tide me over until I can get the game though I don’t have a GameCube or Wii.

    @verity said:
    Welcome Markness🙂

    Sorry you had a bad year, there have been other than had similar experience, and and hope you feel comfortable here.

    Try it out see how it goes. There is the New Member Support category if you are struggling or just hang out.

    Thank you. I’ve been lower before, such as when my ex-friend called me just to tell me she didn’t like me and that she wasn’t my friend anymore while expecting me to just “take it”. She even showed contempt that I was “quiet” in my response but how could I not be after I was told some of the meanest things one can say to another? Still, the last year was unhappy and this year got started off on the wrong foot.

    I posted a thread in there. I really hope I can one day say I have found love after being denied it for so long.

  • HylianHylian Citizen, Mentor

    @Markness said:

    @Hylian said:

    I definitely don't think that you're a creep, and you must be approachable if that woman felt comfortable hugging you. I think that's a promising sign for you, even if that particular girl wasn't looking for a boyfriend.

    Also, that's really cool! I have never read the manga for Twilight Princess, but I've heard a lot of good things about it.

    I also didn’t know whether to ask her out right off the bat or talk to her more. I’ve gotten conflicting advice on this front.

    The art looks great and will tide me over until I can get the game though I don’t have a GameCube or Wii.

    When it comes to the timing of asking people out, I think it's never a bad idea to wait and talk to the person a bit more before you ask them out. Most people appreciate others getting to know them before doing that, it makes you seem more sincerely interested in them.

    I am wondering if Nintendo will port the Twilight Princess remake onto the Switch eventually. If they did that'd be cool, people who want to play it after BotW wouldn't need to get any other game system to play it. Twilight Princess for the GameCube is often more expensive I think than a Switch game now anyways, since people like collecting it. I don't know about the Wii though.

  • WizardryWizardry Citizen, Mentor

    Welcome, Markness. Good to have you here.

  • BenderBender Citizen

    I used to dream of working in a library when I was very young, they were quiet and beautiful places, with people who spoke softly and were very kind towards avid readers. I'm sorry the one you're working in is so different.

    How do you feel after the TMS treatment you've had last year?

  • @Wizardry said:
    Welcome, Markness. Good to have you here.

    Hi, Grand Inquisitor. I wish I could say I’ve gotten better but I honestly haven’t. 😞 I also suffered a meltdown yesterday and could hardly get up today. I wish I didn’t have to go into work today either.

    @Bender said:
    I used to dream of working in a library when I was very young, they were quiet and beautiful places, with people who spoke softly and were very kind towards avid readers. I'm sorry the one you're working in is so different.

    How do you feel after the TMS treatment you've had last year?

    The one I applied to is so much more peaceful and doesn’t smell bad like the one I work at.

    I felt better for a while but going back to college, trying dating apps again unsuccessfully, and having someone I thought was on my side tell me there is more to life than wanting a girlfriend despite him having one himself sent me back into despair. The last bit is also partly why I had a meltdown yesterday.

    @Hylian said:

    @Markness said:

    @Hylian said:

    I definitely don't think that you're a creep, and you must be approachable if that woman felt comfortable hugging you. I think that's a promising sign for you, even if that particular girl wasn't looking for a boyfriend.

    Also, that's really cool! I have never read the manga for Twilight Princess, but I've heard a lot of good things about it.

    I also didn’t know whether to ask her out right off the bat or talk to her more. I’ve gotten conflicting advice on this front.

    The art looks great and will tide me over until I can get the game though I don’t have a GameCube or Wii.

    When it comes to the timing of asking people out, I think it's never a bad idea to wait and talk to the person a bit more before you ask them out. Most people appreciate others getting to know them before doing that, it makes you seem more sincerely interested in them.

    I am wondering if Nintendo will port the Twilight Princess remake onto the Switch eventually. If they did that'd be cool, people who want to play it after BotW wouldn't need to get any other game system to play it. Twilight Princess for the GameCube is often more expensive I think than a Switch game now anyways, since people like collecting it. I don't know about the Wii though.

    Some say you have to do it right away or the woman won’t think you are interested while others say to wait or you will scare her off. I am confused as heck!

    Yes, I would prefer that over spending too much money on aftermarket stuff that goes high these days.

  • I wish I could speak to one of the admins privately.
  • AmityAmity Administrator, Citizen
    Just sent you a pm
    You can reply to it.
  • Hylian said:

    When it comes to the timing of asking people out, I think it's never a bad idea to wait and talk to the person a bit more before you ask them out. Most people appreciate others getting to know them before doing that, it makes you seem more sincerely interested in them.


    That's certainly how I would feel.  I agree with this advice.
  • Mona_PerethMona_Pereth Citizen
    edited February 13
    Markness said:
    Some say you have to do it right away or the woman won’t think you are interested while others say to wait or you will scare her off. I am confused as heck!

    What you should do right away, or as soon as reasonably possible, is talk to her in a friendly way, starting with a a continuation of whatever she might have talked about in the meeting.

  • Markness said:
    Some say you have to do it right away or the woman won’t think you are interested while others say to wait or you will scare her off. I am confused as heck!

    What you should do right away, or as soon as reasonably possible, is talk to her in a friendly way, starting with a a continuation of whatever she might have talked about in the meeting.

    The next time the book club meets is the 20th. I don’t know if that’s reasonably possible or too late. 

    If it hadn’t been for the inclement weather, the speed dating event would’ve happened but it’s been rescheduled to March 5th.
  • I no longer attend the book club, the speed dating event got cancelled permanently, and walking around First Friday was torture.
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